Psychology, strategies, stereotypes
1) Do people have the same needs? Do needs of different people vary?
2) Can we become happy just by moderating our demands? Is it difficult for us to moderate our demands?
3) What do you think of that attitude? "Now I am working very hard, so right now happiness is hardly possible; but when I get what I need, I will be happy!"
4) What do you need for happiness? Imagine: you have got what you have always needed; will you become happy?
5) Do you believe to people who say that they are happy and have everything they need? Isn't it just a role of a happy person? Why do we need to look happier than we are in reality?
6) Can we be just happy? To feel happy do we need to compare our lives with those of others?
7) People of the past lived in very harsh conditions. Were people of the past unhappy? Could people of today be happy in harsh conditions of the past?
8) Do big ambitions and demands show that a person is strong and so deserves everything? Or is the need of special conditions just a kind of an atrophy of ability to be happy?
9) If a person is unhappy, does it mean than God does not love him (her)?
Conflicts and guilt
1) Is it true that in any conflict both sides are always guilty?
2) Should I consider any conflict to be mea culpa (my guilt)?
3) By what criteria can we decide who is right and who is wrong?
4) Do you try to understand your opponent? Do you want him to understand you?
5) Can you say to your opponent what he thinks in such words that he will agree that he is understood right? Do you sometimes do that?
6) Are people always aware of their motives? Are they responsible for motives they are not aware of?
7) Should we always forgive people their debts, as Christians suggest? Is it so even when someone does not recognize one's debts?
8) Will unresolved conflicts mean something in the afterlife world?
9) Do you want bad people to go to hell and to pay for what they have done?
Are you happy to be Russian?
1) Does Russia deserve to be respected? Yes, it does, because it has nuclear weapon?
2) Do you really need to respect your state? What do you think of those who do need? Of those who do not need?
3) Why do you need to be a part of a great nation and its great project? Or is it only your private life what matters for you?
4) What is and what could become Russia’s national idea?
5) Will Russia ever be accepted by the world community? Does Russia really need it?
6) Can Russia become a superpower once more? What must be done for that?
7) Do you have lots of friends?
8) Do you like your city?
10) Are you happy with your life?
Can you be a psychologist to yourself?
1) Do you want to be a psychologist to yourself? Isn’t it cool to have a psychologist every moment you need him and for free?
2) There are three universal questions to begin self-exploration. Do you ask yourself these questions? Which of them most frequently?
~Why can't I do better what I am always trying to do better?
~What do I want in my life?
~What am I doing and for what? Whose plays am I playing?
3) Can you suggest other universal questions to begin self-exploration?
4) Working with problems can sometimes deteriorate problems? Is it worth to take a risk?
5) Isn't it better to be always positive without asking too many questions?
6) Can the deep exploration make our life less enigmatic?
7) What is more effective, reading books or thinking by oneself?
8) Is it possible to become a psychologist without reading psychological books?
9) Can institutes make real psychologists?
10) Creating your own business. Isn't it the best way to become a real psychologist?
11) Businessmen, taxi drivers, sellers, journalists, writers, teachers... Are they real psychologists?
12) Are so professional psychologists real psychologists?
1) Here we see some life strategies. Which of them is the best one? Do other strategies exist? What is your main strategy?
~To go where the circumstances are better
~To adjust oneself to circumstances
~To alter circumstances
~To change one's attitude to circumstances
~Just to wait till everything will change to better by itself
2) Do you prefer to do what you can do easily, or to overcome difficulties and hardships?
3) Do occasions exist in our world; or do all things have their causes (reasons), sometimes unknown to us?
4) Should we adjust ourselves to the inconsistent world; or should we adjust the world to our needs?
5) Does everything depend on us? Can we improve our IQ, for example?
6) Do we have to believe someone who says that he would be successful in any circumstances?
7) The one who does not want to work will always find excuses, won’t he? The one who want to work will always find possibility, won’t he?
7) Do you believe our thoughts can directly influence our world? Or is it schizophrenia?
8) Should we help talented, gifted people? Or just the opposite: should we help those who are handicapped by nature or by circumstances?
9) Does everyone have one's own gift? Are all people endowed equally by God, by Nature?
What motivates us to conflicts?
1) What makes people conflict? Is it only the results or do people enjoy the process itself?
2) May some people need negative emotions, not even being aware of that need?
3) Is it true that in any conflict both sides are always guilty?
4) If you don't intend to conflict but your opponent does; can you avoid the conflict?
5) Can it happen so that nobody wants to conflict; but yet the conflict occurs?
6) Life without conflicts is boring, isn’t it?
7) Every literature book is built around its conflict. If our life is the art it should have its conflict, shouldn’t it?
8) Should we always forgive people their debts, as Christians suggest?
9) Will unresolved conflicts mean something in the afterlife world?
10) Do your ready to fight God?
11) Should the hell exist in the best of the worlds?
Hippy, what should we take from them?
1) Make love, not war! Is it a good principle? If it is good, why people don't follow it? Do you follow it yourself? What about making love? What about making war?
2) Don't worry, by happy! Do we need to have ambitions, goals or is it better just to enjoy our lives?
3) Do you like long hair and simple dressing? Have you ever dressed like hippy? Why was it condemned by society?
4) Do you like rock-n-roll? Why was music so important for every one of hippy?
5) Meditations, mysticism, vegetarianism... Does all that lead to self-development or to losing the contact with the reality?
6) Was sexual revolution a way to freedom or was it only the beginning of libertinism, wantonness and degradation?
7) Is it a good idea to stop to compete with people? Is it possible to stop to compete?
8) Are drugs the absolute evil or is there something positive in them?
9) Would you like to travel by auto-stop, to live in communities?
One edited text from Internet:
Hippie fashions and values had a major effect on culture, influencing popular music, television, film, literature, and the arts. Since the 1960s, many aspects of hippie culture have been assimilated by the mainstream. The religious and cultural diversity espoused by the hippies has gained widespread acceptance, and Eastern philosophy and spiritual concepts have reached a wide audience. The hippie legacy can be observed in contemporary culture in a myriad of forms - from health food, to music festivals, to contemporary sexual mores, and even to the cyberspace revolution.
1) Do you want to be a leader? The desire to be a leader, where does it come from?
2) Is leadership benefits of position, or is it hardness of work?
3) A ram or a thunderbird (storm-petrel)? There is a flock and there is a ram walking firs in a meadow with very sweet green grass. There is a storm sea and a thunderbird soaring in the wind all alone. Who of them is a leader? Who do you like more and why?
4) Isn't it wiser never to be a leader and always try to be in the middle? Isn't it better to be ready to accept any position?
5) What do people like more, to obey or to command? What is more natural for you?
6) Do you want to be a leader in our communication club? It's quite possible. You are welcome.
7) Are you ready to give up your position to someone who can work better than you?
8) Can leaders influence the history? Who provides the progress?
9) If someone became a president of a state, does it mean that he is a strong and smart person?
10) Who usually becomes the center and the heart of the company?
11) Can a person deliberately develop a leader character? Is it possible to teach others how to become leaders?
12) What does the word leader mean for you now? Do you still want to be a leader?
1) Is it right that any communication is a manipulation? But then what do we need the "word" manipulation for?
2) Can Gypsies hypnotize people? Have you ever seen in your life hypnosis like that?
3) Do you agree that trance is a very common state of mind; and so it can be easily used for making people do what they don't want to?
4) What do you think of NLP?
5) Does the media successfully manipulate people? Does the media successfully manipulate you?
6) Can we motivate people without manipulating them? Are there other things in nature except carrot and stick (whip and gingerbread, as Russians say)?
7) People like to be manipulated, don't they? They don't want others to try to communicate with their rational sides. If they want you to manipulate them, will you still try to communicate with their rational minds?
8) Love is a trance, isn't it? Would you advice people never let themselves fall in love?
Openness and Reticence
To be an open person means to be communicative, sincere, and honest. Don't we miss something?
1) Is it a good idea to always say the first thing that comes into your mind?
2) What kind of people do you like more, open or closed?
3) When do we need to be reticent, insincere or diplomatic?
4) When do we need to be open and sincere?
5) What troubles can needless or excessive openness cause to?
6) To what consequences can unnecessary or excessive reticence lead?
7) Is it a good idea to talk to a friend (a stranger) about your problems?
8) Is it a good idea to talk to somebody about your successes?
9) Who are more sincere, men or women? Do you agree that women are better liars, but are also more sincere?
People, be open!
Let us discuss some controversial suggestions:
1) Naturism is normal so it must be propagandized. If you are not a nudist, you are a neurotic.
2) We don't have to be shy even if our bodies and souls are not perfect. Perfection is not for everyone, not for ever; and we have to remember it.
3) We don't have to try to look better than we are in reality. Trying to look better, we lose more than gain.
4) Closed people are always neurotics. Psychoanalysis works only because it makes people become open, become nudists, so to say.
5) It is not necessary for a psychoanalyst to be an expert in psychology. It is enough for him to understand the mystery (sacrament) of undressing.
6) If you are not open with others, you will never be open with yourself. All problems come from that. Become open; and your psychological problems disappear by themselves.
7) Kitchens also must be open, if we want to have healthy food.
8) All the evil comes from secrecy. Governments have no right to keep secrets.
9) If you play chess against somebody and tell your rival your plans; it won't help him.
1) Why do Americans visit psychoanalysts while Russians almost never do it?
2) Do you think that psychoanalysis could help you?
3) Is it a sane idea to discuss the most intimate thoughts, desires and fears with friends? Do you discuss your life strategies with anybody?
4) Don’t you fear that psychoanalysis may become destructive for your soul?
5) Do you have a need to understand yourself? Do you try to?
6) Do you try to understand others?
7) Are you ready to pay money to psychoanalysts?
8) Have you ever red psychoanalytical books? Do you read them?
9) Have you ever tried to puzzle out your dreams?
1) Do we need to discuss our problems with somebody? Pros and contras, please.
2) If we choose to discuss, whom should we prefer, a professional, or a good friend, or just a stranger?
3) What is more effective, psychoanalysis or search for the truth?
4) Can the church substitute a psychologist?
5) Can "help" of a psychologist deteriorate your situation? Can you give some examples?
6) How can someone tell a good psychologist from a bad one?
7) Do you know somebody who is visiting a psychologist or somebody who used to visit him (her)? Do you know somebody to whom a psychologist really helped?
8) Why do Americans visit psychoanalysts while Russians almost never do it?
9) Can psychologists resolve their own problems, such as creating businesses of their own?
10) If you have a problem with foreign languages, for example, can a psychologist help you with it?
11) Should we change our life or should we patiently adjust ourselves to circumstances?
1) Is it normal that the strong always uses the weak?
2) Does a strong nation have a right to exploit a weak one?
3) Do genetically strong nations exist?
4) Does being good and kind mean being weak?
5) Are moral and conscience only inventions of weak but sly creatures?
6) Do societies need natural selection similar to one that exists in wild nature? Don't we spoil our society by supporting the weak?
7) Is it the only way to make society more successful - to become successful by oneself? Do you know other ways?
8) Should we worry about public interests? Isn't it our duty to worry only about ourselves?
To understand or not to understand?
1) Would you like to be able to read other's thoughts? What are the pluses and the minuses of that ability?
2) Would you like others to be able to read your thoughts?
3) Do you want to understand yourself?
4) Do you try to find the cause of causes of what is happening? Is it some kind of craziness, trying to find the essence and the sense of the life?
5) Do you like smart men, smart women? Don't they irritate you sometimes?
6) What is more important in our life, being smart or being rich? Can there be an antagonism between these two?
7) Who would you like to marry, a rich or a smart man (woman)?
Do you like people? Do you love people?
1) Do you like people? What about children, men, women? Do you love them?
2) Are people good by nature?
3) Is everything is determined by upbringing, or there exist people who would become strong and good in any circumstances?
4) Should we force people to be good?
5) Do you like leaders?
6) Do you like the obedient?
7) Conscience, fear, sympathy… Which of them prevents people from committing crimes?
8) Do you like those who like to help others?
1) Do we need gurus or teachers? Should we try to find some one?
2) How do you react to people who call themselves gurus?
3) How can we distinguish between a teacher and a cheater?
4) Are you ready to pay money to a teacher? How much are you ready to pay for unique knowledge the guru can provide?
5) Gurus often teach us to believe in money. What do you think of that?
6) What do you think of Kiyosaki, Anastasiya, Dianetics, Scientology, NLP, yoga, Zen, Orthodox Christian Church?
7) Why do people need sects?
8) Sects and religions, is there any difference between them?
9) How can we save someone from a destructive sect, from a guru?
Is it dangerous to study psychology and explore our life?
And I gave my heart to know wisdom, and to know madness and folly: I perceived that this also is vexation of spirit. For in much wisdom is much grief: and he that increaseth knowledge increaseth sorrow.
1) To really understand things means to understand Good and Evil, and for that you will have to participate in their confrontation. Is it not dangerous?
2) Being stupid is a kind of self-protection and self-defense. It’s also a means of attack and offence, isn’t it?
3) If you understand people and things too well, people will be afraid of you, won’t they?
4) If you are too smart, people will probably try to punish you for your superiority, won’t they?
5) If you see how disgusting it is to be an idiot, you will never have some advantages idiots have.
6) Right conclusions may lead to wrong ways of living. For example, it is a right thought: our time is precious. Is it not? What will be the conclusions? Are they as right as the right premise?
7) Instead of studying life, isn’t it better to study how to earn money to buy a good apartment?
8) You began to feel the real joy of knowledge and then suddenly stopped the exploration of life, how will it affect your karma?
"See here, Jonathan," said his father, not unkindly. "Winter isn't far away. Boats will be few, and the surface fish will be swimming deep. If you must study, then study food, and how to get it. This flying business is all very well, but you can't eat a glide, you know. Don't you forget that the reason you fly is to eat." Jonathan nodded obediently. For the next few days he tried to behave like the other gulls; he really tried, screeching and fighting with the flock around the piers and fishing boats, diving on scraps of fish and bread. But he couldn't make it work.
Why do people lie?
1) Do people who never lie exist in nature? Is it possible not to lie at all?
2) Is it natural for you to lie in critical situations?
3) If you never lie, at least, you are original. Isn’t it an argument never to lie?
4) Is it comfortable to live with somebody who never lies? Do you want to be one with whom it is comfortable to live?
5) Is it comfortable to live with somebody who never afraid to tell the truth and doesn’t care too much about your reactions on it?
6) What do you think of imposing the truth?
7) If someone’s lie is a kind of art, should it be respected? Can you give examples of such a lie?
8) What do you think of stupid, primitive, routine lie?
9) What is worse, to lie, hiding one’s eyes, or to lie impudently and boldly?
10) Are Russians relatively honest people?
11) Who are better liars, men or women?
What is lie?
1) If you try to lie through your body-language (to play a self-confident person, for instant), should it be considered a lie?
2) If you have already deceived yourself, should your words be considered a lie?
3) If you don’t even try to deceive anybody and just make people to accept your lie by force, should it be considered lying?
4) If you don’t lie, but only embellish the reality, is it lie or not? Is the makeup a kind of lie? What about the plastic surgery?
5) If you don’t lie, but only show the best sides of the reality, is it lie or not?
6) Can someone, who never lies, be a good seller?
7) Is it a good idea to tell the truth to an enemy, to a bureaucrat, to a boss, to a patient?
8) Do we damage our karma by lying?
Greed, laziness, cowardice
1) What are you ready to exchange your freedom for?
~ For money?
~ For knowledge and education?
~ For universal knowledge of how to get any knowledge you need?
~ For your social position in future?
~ For good deeds which will come back to you sooner or later in that life or in the afterlife?
~ For accomplishment of your mission in that life?
2) Is freedom the ultimate value? What do you need your freedom for?
3) Do you work on improving yourself?
4) Do you work on your career?
5) Do you try to understand people and life?
6) Do you work on creating your own business?
7) Do you work on other projects?
8) Are you ready to try all sex experiments that are interesting to you or are you afraid of opinions of others?
9) Can you say to everybody everything you think?
10) Do you fear your boss, your spouse, somebody?
11) Do you give up to aggressive people?
12) Can you be open and not be shy of yourself, of your body, of your mind?
Let's talk about one's ability to deal only with positive sides of the reality.
1) Do you think it's a good idea not to see your own disadvantages? Why not choose that positive perception of yourself?
2) Not all people are perfect. Let's not pay attention to their bad sides?
3) Don't try to overcome your disadvantages. Do try to improve your positive sides. What do you think of that suggestion?
4) Do not conflict, make friends!
5) If you don't understand that you are miserable, you don't suffer from your misery.
6) Be positive if you want people to love you!
Sex, power, money, et cetera…
Sex, power, money, gambling, foreign languages, drugs and other kinds of kaif and drive
1) Men or women, who needs it more, who enjoys it more, who suffers from it more?
2) Should we foster and encourage our love to it? Should we diminish, soothe or abolish it?
3) How can we foster or diminish it?
4) What about excessivenesses and deviations?
5) What do you think of and about people who are extremely interested in it?
…called also self-fulfilling, self-fulfillment, personal fulfillment, use one's potential, accomplishment, realization, completion, success…
1) What is self-actualization?
2) What will make you happier, life for self-fulfillment or life for pleasure?
3) How can we find our destiny? Does it exist?
4) Is society interested in your self-actualization? Will it help you? Will it hamper your struggle?
5) Were Stalin and Hitler successful in their self-fulfillment?
6) What is the better way of self-presentation: a genius-loser or a very successful mediocrity?
7) Can one succeed in his self-fulfillment if he (she) is alone and nobody cooperates with him (her)?
8) Is it our fault if we don’t have co-operators or friends?
9) If you have to choose between being honest and being a winner what will you choose?
10) Is everyone really unique?
11) What is your main life-project?
Psychologists and their problems
1) We have as many opinions as psychologists. Is psychology a science?
2) The typical style of self-presentation for them is that: I am a clever man (woman), because a great science stands behind my words. Is it fair?
3) They have no permission to give advice. And why not?
4) They should try to explain things that their clients don’t want to see. Is it a comfortable role to be a psychologist? Isn’t it more natural to kick away (to give a boot to) all ignorant people with all their ignorance?
5) They must be smarter than you and keep psychological distance. They mustn’t be emotional. Do you like it?
6) What real things can they do except for talking?
7) Sexual relations with clients are forbidden for them. Why something should be forbidden at all?
By the laws or by the notions?
1) What is the difference between laws and “notions” (codes of the underworld)? Are the notions the only real laws or are they only shadows of real written laws?
2) Having to choose between the law and the justice, what will you choose?
3) Does such a thing as rightness (fairness) exist in nature or is it only an invention of human imagination? Is the world fair?
4) Can anarchy exist?
5) Is there any principle difference between court, tribunal, mob law and lynching?
6) Should we distinguish between “ours”, “allies” and “aliens”, “strangers”?
7) What would happen if the real laws should become the written laws?
8) What makes society to write laws it doesn’t want to follow?
9) Should a civil servant (officer) be rewarded (paid) for not following stupid and cruel written laws?
10) What is the real state? What real institutions make people prefer notions rather than laws?
11) How many real states do we have in our state?
Being clever is the stupidest choice in the world, isn’t it? Do you want to be clever?
1) If you had to choose between to be clever and to be rich, what would you choose?
2) Do you want to be very sensitive? Why do people usually choose not to be?
3) Are you always ready to accept the truth? Are you ready to admit that you are not right when you are not right? Why do people usually prefer not to do it?
4) Are you always ready to support people with your attention and understanding? Why do people prefer not to do it?
5) Do you want to be intelligent and to have all self-restrictions typical for intelligent people? What are disadvantages of that?
6) Are you not afraid of being alone when nobody is able to talk about things which are interesting to you?
7) Do you want to have your own system of values which is not shared by the majority? To what consequences can it lead?
8) Do you want to communicate pretty much and discuss very private things with others? Or do you think the intelligence doesn’t depend on that?
9) Do you want to free your sexual and power instincts? Do you want to have adventures that will inevitably follow such liberation?
10) Do you want to love people even knowing that they do not love you? Or do you think love and hatred have nothing to do with the intelligence?
11) Are you ready to spend long hours for thinking about things when answers have already been given to everyone?
12) Isn’t it better to think about money and not about how the world is built?
13) Do you want to participate in the war between good and evil? Or do you think it is not necessary for understanding of the essence of things?
14) Do you want to try your own ways and not already well known ones?
15) Do you think people will forgive you your understanding their motives?
16) Don’t you think people will try to punish you for your superiority?
17) If you happened to be miserable, do you want to understand it?
Do you want to be charismatic?
1) Will you like always to be in the center of very strong and deep attention?
2) Do you like to provoke people and invent adventures?
3) Would you like to use symbols of power which hypnotize majority of (stupid) people? Do you like to have a very American and very successful appearance?
4) Would you like to enjoy respect you don't deserve?
5) Will you try natural but not standard and therefore very risky behavior? What about telling people the truth?
6) Would you like to try all possible and impossible sexual experiments to liberate your sexuality? Or do you think this has nothing to do with charisma?
7) Are you ready to destroy your enemies or adversaries ruthlessly? Or do pity, compassion, sorrow and remorse hamper you?
8) Are other people interesting for you? Or do you never subsidize others with your interest and attention?
9) Why do you think you deserve unique attention?
10) Are you the one who gives exams or the one who always takes them?
11) Do you share or hide secrets of your magic? Or do you never think about such a stupid and childish thing as “magic”?
12) Would you like to be a hypnotist?
13) What is better - to be a very successful mediocrity or a genius-loser?
Some very controversial principles of effective behavior
1) Everything is permitted. You mustn’t only be caught. You mustn’t only get in troubles. There is no crime but stupidity.
2) Never worry about your karma.
3) Care about nobody but yourself.
4) Do only what you want to do.
5) Regret about nothing. And then, why do people regret?
6) Never brake. And then, why do people brake?
7) Never react on things which have nothing to do with your own business. And then, why do people DO react?
8) Never do things for free.
9) Distinguish between things which are good for people and things for which people are ready to pay.
10) A man must be like one who is accepted. (As Nikulin once said about his character Balbes)
11) Never believe, never fear, never ask.
12) Be present in everything you do.
13) What other principles of effective behavior could you suggest?
1) Do you live for drives? Or are you an absolutely sober person?
2) Who is closer to you, Dionysus with his bacchantes or Apollo with his muses?
3) Is it good to be a workaholic?
4) Is it good to be a gambler? Is it good to be a businessman? Isn’t it like being a gambler?
5) Is it good to be a sexoholic, sexoman, sexonaut (a person who explores the outer limits of sex)?
6) Is it good to be linguaholic, linguaman, linguanaut?
7) Can Tantra be a religion and a way do God?
8) Can psychedelics lead to anything good? Can psychonautics of any kind lead to anything good?
9) What do you think of nondrinkers (teetotallers)? What do you think of those who drink never, nowhere and with nobody?
10) Would you like to be forever young and forever drunk? This question is not about alcohol only. Would you like to go from one drive to another for all your life?
11) Can there be a drive without frustration and happiness without dissatisfaction?
12) Is there something really precious in our lives? Isn’t any good thing only a prize for the victory in some game we have invented not to be bored? It’s like being a fan of football club, isn’t it? Does it really matter what club wins in football?
13) How do you fight your boredom?
14) Do you always want to find new things of are you ready to search for drive developing ultimate sensitivity and understanding doing the same things over and over again? Can one sexual partner be sufficient for all the life?
15) If you have your keif-orientation you will probably find a friend, won’t you? Friends are always for sharing mutual keif? Aren’t they?
16) Do we choose our keif-orientation or does our nature do it for us?